When I Get Older Project

When I get older.

This was the title of a composition I wrote a long time ago, during an english course, when I was around fifteen years old.

My teacher liked it so much that he wrote, as an observation to my A+ grade: “Wonderful Mariana. Were I you, I’d keep this in a safe place and read it when you are actually 64!!!”.

And so did I. Since everybody says young people are more confident and fearless, I keep my text to remember me of my youth freshness and revolutionary goals. Hoppefully, I am not 64 yet but, as time passes by, every now and then, I use to take a look at my essay, as if it’s some kind of life manual.

Today, one more time, I searched for my text to guide me through another moment of life reflection, or, in better words, a kind of life crisis.

As I read it, I got happy because I realized I was abble to accomplish most of my targets, specialy in my personal life. I’m 38 now. I’m married to the love of my life and, as I wished then, “we would love and help each other, travel together and have basically the same purposes, we would trust and give freedom to each other”. We have a nine month old baby girl that is our little princess. I have a stable job in the government. We have our own apartment and travel abroad once a year.

Everything is fine.

In spite of that, for the first time since I wrote my essay, I got a little bit disappointed with the conservative young me and the way I used to think of my life in future.  I didn’t wish to accomplish great things. I didn’t have big plans about my carreer. In fact, I didn’t even mention what I wanted to do as a profession when I got old.

It was frustrating, since that was the answer I was trying to find when I read my “plans to the future” once again.

Basically I said I would continue doing the same things I used to do, “such as physical exercises, going out with my friends, and also drive and work”. But what kind of work? Couldn’t I have been more specific?

Reading again and again my text, I found something that maybe will answer some of my issues and guide me through my professional crisis. I did mention something about “enjoying my life the best I can” and not believing in the “idea that many people have: that you only reach happiness when you get older and stop working”. Indeed, it would be really sad to live life waiting for retirement or expecting to get old to finally enjoy life.

However, I disagree with the young Mariana in one point. She said “it may happen, but, normally, you, by yourself, can not make a big change in your life all of a sudden”.

In fact, young Mariana, that is exactly what I am planning to do, and that was the reason I revived your essay. You guided me to this point, which is not bad and I am very happy. Thanks for your effort and,  since we accomplished all you planned for our future, from now on, I’m leading us through more audacious paths.

To guide us in this hole new journey, I will write another essay to complement the first one, with new objectives and - contradicting your thoughts - a turnaround in our life. To sharpen your curiosity, all I can tell you at this point is that maybe we should try new air.

The sky is the limit! You wait and see.

TO BE CONTINUED...